Blog Post- All About the “Fam” Part 3 : Jake
Just being around this guy makes my heart smile! His mere presence can bring a sense of peace.
It is so interesting to me how when your children are tiny they are shadows of what they are to become.
When Jake was born I actually struggled some with postpartum depression. It was probably not severe but as I had never experienced it with my previous two children it took me by surprise. I cried often and just felt sad off and on and overwhelmed by life. The enemy was hitting me hard with his lies that I could not adequately care for my three children.
However, the Lord goes before us. It is just like the Lord to know this and bless me with a very joyful and content baby in Jake. I can hardly remember him without a smile on his face. There were many times those first few years he would crawl up on my lap and lay his head on my shoulder and make me smile. I remember one day being in my bedroom in tears when he was still small and he brought my Bible to me and said, ” Here, Mama, just read this and speak it out loud and you will feel better.” I love the faith of a child! Somehow he knew that Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word.
Jake has carried this sweet and simple gift of faith into the present! He seems to be able to see through difficult chaotic situations to the simple truth of the matter,which encourages and reminds those of us around him that God is in control!
One of my favorite things about Jake is how he makes us laugh! The Word says, “Laughter is good medicine.” I can honestly say that sometimes it is the very thing that has made some very hard days of late, bearable.
If you think about it, you can’t really laugh if you are obsessing over something that isn’t going right in your life. It actually takes you forgetting about it ( putting it in the Father’s hands) long enough to allow something so pure and funny to overwhelm your heart and produce laughter.
Jake has had to do some hard things this past year. He came home at Christmas break from school and his friends to help me physically care for his Dad for the last remaining months of his battle with glioblastoma brain cancer. I could no longer lift him by myself and yet hospice had not yet entered the picture. We were still hoping for a miracle. Jake had also spent the previous few months of the fall traveling back and forth to Chicago with us for treatment. So, I guess you could say his life was not your typical 17 year old’s life.
It is odd to me how sometimes the hardest things we are required to do also produce some wonderful moments.
I got to watch Jake die to himself over and over and do things that were way outside his comfort zone because he desired so badly to honor his Heavenly Father and his earthly Father. I watched him witness to people on airplanes, comfort me in my tears, create moments of normalcy and laughter for his Dad. I watched him pray in faith for his Daddy’s healing and when his prayer wasn’t answered the way he wanted, I saw him choose to trust in God’s plan when his flesh cried out to be in Heaven with his Dad. I watched him become a man! A man that his Daddy would be so proud of even though he had lost the ability to speak those words or convey those thoughts.
Life is hard! There are some days I long to have a break from this
“Walking by faith” business. But then I remember these things…..
“Then Jesus told him, You believe because you have seen me. Blessed are those who believe without seeing me.”- John 20:29
“For we live by faith, not by sight.”-2 Corinthians 5:7
We are constantly bombarded in this life by the world telling us to
“Live it Up!”
They are putting their own spin on that and trying to redefine what living should look like.
But when I feel like this world is spinning out of control. I bring my heart back to the one true constant.
He is the same yesterday, today and forever! He tells me“living”is by faith and not by sight.
” I will lift up my eyes unto the hills-
From whence comes my help?
My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to be moved;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
The Lord is your keeper;
The Lord is your shade at your right hand.
The Lord shall preserve your going out and
your coming in.
From this time forth and even forevermore.” Psalm 121